Two questions

I have two questions about my life.
One is my relationship with my daughters and the another one is my education in my future.

Yesterday I found an article on the Internet that tells about relationship between mother and daughter. I have not read them all yet but it looks very interesting.
So I am going to read it (it is only a few pages) and if possible I want to read whole her (the author) book.
If I read through, I might be able to find a tip of hints to have better relationship with my daughters.
And also I would like them to read the Japanese version if they could have one.

Next question is, why is it common sense that over fifties people especially women don't need more education?
Most of people in Japan have got these thought and my darling too.
It is terrible. They are going to take my learning opportunity out from me. So I love New Zealand much much better than Japan.
Japan has really strange common senses a lot! I hate them and I moved to overseas.
( This is totally complaint) In Japan, I guess more than 95% of people are thinking over forties women should stay home and do anything.
I found in overseas, all women enjoy their job and except the the period that they are bringing children, they want to have a job whole their life till the retirement.
However these women need higher education equivalent to men but in Japan, according to funny common sense, women don't need higher education than men.
Recently the idea has been changed but still most women don't have enough education that they are able to keep their carrier till their retirement.
And people with lower education can not really enjoy their job.
For example, who really enjoy the cleaning or wash dishes? no one...
They are not creative job at all however some one must do these job in this world, terrible isn't it?
So I don't like housekeeping to others. To myself or my family are OK however it is still no paid work and not many people respect it.

Hmm.. I was probably better to born as a boy. No, no. Women should have same  rights with men. Although recently we are almost equal, not quite equal yet particularly in the developing countries.  

(I have just stopped to write now because my brain does not work very well as I should think about a lot of things at this moment.)

I feel I am stupid

We are middle fifty's and most of people of our age have their stable life.
But we are still floating like a driftwood on the shore or in a river.
And we could never find our place to end up.
Since I was a kid, I have been moving a lot and always hoped to stay in a same place like others.
Live in my nice own house, have my own garden even it is small, spend a comfortable dairy life and daughters and grandkids visit me...something like that.

However no our kids visit us and we are still keep moving.
We don't have our own house (it does not have to be a house, own place is fine).
I think we are not adults yet, still our mind are like kids and we don't know how to settle in a calm and peaceful life, why??
Call us unorganized people.
We have not had our own life plan even though my darling wants to earn more money.
My minimum hope is live in a happiness, eat nice food, been healthy, sometimes traveling around and have a lot of laugh with my family.

I think we are both awkward about family relationship.
That is why we live in overseas otherwise we were in our home countries.
So it is probably our destiny...hmm...not good.

I don't know this is a good thing or not but today I was a bit embarrassed when my Canberra friend cut our phone call.
Of course, she is not a perfect person but she is together with her partner since she was 18 and she has lived here since then as well.
I have known a lot of people like her. Do we call those person "Adults"?
And we are "Stupid kids" if we are keep moving.
I don't want think so...

Not many people can moving around everywhere.
And both kinds of people hope they are right.
Anyway, I was embarrassed myself a bit today.
It may because of my own personality, I mean it is my fault.
People around me might discover that I am TOO positive.
Too positive sometimes means inconsiderable.

However although I made my life plan, it is always broken somehow.
    
 

It has been very frustrating

My darling's company is not going very well and I hate his business partner, sorry.
I wanted my darling to have a base job since he started his own business.
Because they don't have enough money stock when they have financial troubles so they always have possibilities to been limbos.

The other day my darling found a job in New Zealand but we were not really happy about it.
We have got two different reasons individually.
His issue is break the relationship with his business partner if he was gone.
My issue is that I would like him to keep staying Australia longer and save more money before we go back to New Zealand for our retirement.
So it is too early to go back.

However we were happy enough about him to got a better job there.

The day after that he had two more phone calls for interviews.
(I was so embarrassed to told our moving to ALL my chorus members!)
And Zela was also upset to my email that I told the her our quite changeable situation.
We are very frustrating at this moment.
My darling has got four opportunities that moving to NZ, moving to Japan, keep staying in Canberra and keep going his own business.
It depends on each situation, I need think about what I could do.
Moving to New Zealand is actually the best opportunity for ME.
I could study in a course, could find a job, could join in a nice chorus and be peaceful life again.

However I like changing.
Although I hated Japanese culture and people, I could be patient to stay in Japan for one or two years. ( But I am really afraid of losing my English skills.)
Staying Canberra is tough but it will be good experience for me to handle all kinds of tough situation in the future.  

It has been VERY frustrating week!! till we know where we go.