My Significant others

I have been down since last Friday and my darling says that I am grumpy.
The reason is my youngest daughter, oldest of course, probably middle too.
I have already known I would not back to Japan unless travelling.
All my daughters should know about it too, I hope. Yes, I told them.
We have known that.

However we still have some troubles about our relationship.
Let's try to think... the answer is " I am an unusual mother" at my age.
It is maybe a common sense only in Japan.
In other countries, many women are travelling in the world since long time ago.
But Japan is a quite isolated country. We have our own culture and language. And especially at my age, people do not like changing, I think.

So, I have sometimes been unhappy about our situation of my children and I. 
However it should not be a cause of worse relationship of my significant others and I. (I was mean today. Not mean, I wanted to some help from him.)
But I have also known my darling cannot help it.

When I think about my darling, he is not the father of my children, He can be, but very difficult as well as I cannot be a mother of his sons.
We had lived other countries with other culture and other language for a long years. His sons and my daughters cannot coop with because they are very different culturally. 
It seems difficult that get married to foreigner. Only my darling and I, it is OK. But if I think about whole our family, it sounds difficult.

However, on the other hand, we will know about different culture and we will understand each other much more later, I hope.   
International marriage is not too bad because it has advantage for sure.

Anyway, I have been bad mood and I feel sorry about it to my darling, but I cannot deal with my problem yet. Really bad.
I wish time will be gone faster and one day all my daughters understand me well. And I really hope that that they will visit me occasionally.